To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
