Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
