a queef is a wish your heart makes.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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