That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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