I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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