NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize