im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
