Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I didn't notice because vodka
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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