Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
