I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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