i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
