Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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