i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
