If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize