So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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