My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
