What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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