Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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