let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
