Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
