# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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