My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize