is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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