the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
