that's an acceptable place to lick
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
