is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I should be sponsored by Trojan
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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