I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
She needs sedatives and a leash
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Shame - the story of my life.
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