i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.