Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.

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  (404): last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy. http://tfl.nu/ky7z
  Replies (12) Good night (844) Bad night (5039) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial

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  (480): I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial http://tfl.nu/135m
  Replies (7) Good night (1212) Bad night (831) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died

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  (860): Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died http://tfl.nu/dll1
  Replies (13) Good night (543) Bad night (2639) Order T-Shirt
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth

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  (414): it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth http://tfl.nu/rgv0
  Replies (19) Good night (810) Bad night (4524) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it

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  (774): i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it http://tfl.nu/c3d8
  Replies (45) Good night (3600) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys

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  (925): she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys http://tfl.nu/nc2y
  Replies (21) Good night (3904) Bad night (1592) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober

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  (608): so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober http://tfl.nu/y352
  Replies (6) Good night (864) Bad night (3360) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.

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  (443): Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER. http://tfl.nu/iqvs
  Replies (4) Good night (4959) Bad night (764) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency

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  (217): Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency http://tfl.nu/yuks
  Replies (10) Good night (3777) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.

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  (931): Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever. http://tfl.nu/3e6h
  Replies (4) Good night (1351) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  DR UNK TOWN USA

  (770): View more from Georgia

  TEAM USA GO AMERICA

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  (770): DR UNK TOWN USA (770): TEAM USA GO AMERICA http://tfl.nu/6sjd
  Replies (3) Good night (868) Bad night (335)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk

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  (847): being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk http://tfl.nu/qiyf
  Replies (6) Good night (890) Bad night (366) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.

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  (410): Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea. http://tfl.nu/1cgp
  Replies (4) Good night (582) Bad night (499) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"

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  (443): My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch" http://tfl.nu/szrk
  Replies (4) Good night (1347) Bad night (293)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.

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  (832): I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway. http://tfl.nu/6mtf
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (388)

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