i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
We're too hungover to prance.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???