I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Randomize
