So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
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We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
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That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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