I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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