i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
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I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
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We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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