he shaved USA in his pubs
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
then he tried to convert me to islam
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
