quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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