champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
