You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
