It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
My life is pants optional.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
