she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
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I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
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Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
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