Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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