It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
