And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize