either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
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