Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
