She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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