i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
