Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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