I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
