They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize
