party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Randomize
