You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
