She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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