that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.