Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
